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Spiders in Borneo

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  1. #21

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    Come on Moving that's a bit harsh calling somebody Stupid because they have a Phobia.

    Fianna, For some people it's the confrontation method that works for them. The more you see them the more you get used to it. What is it exactly that causes your arachnophobia?


  2. #22

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    I've resisted from saying something....till now.

    People have it too good. While millions fight every day about securing food to live someone comes online to rant about a couple of spiders might jump out of the sky onto them and ruin their holiday!

    I think the OP needs to get perspective and also take a look at herself.


  3. #23

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    Phobias are mostly irrational. I know loads of people who are frightened of snakes, even on the TV! I remember seeing on TV a man who was petrified of baked beans which was a bit of a problem because he worked in a UK cafe. He couldn't even look at a tin of them.


  4. #24

    Give her a break, there is a difference between a phobia and simply not liking something. Phobias are irrational, op most likely already knows that. Don't see how it constructive to call her an idiot and remind her of the starving children in the world!

    Its too soon for this trip but I agree that you should actively seek professional help.
    Maybe everyday ask someone to show you a photo of a spider, starting with cartoons/3d imagery if you can't handle the real stuff and build up a tolerance to seeing them.
    It will take a while but if you try hard enough you can overcome this sort of stuff.

    Sent from my GT-S5570 using GeoClicks Mobile


  5. #25

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    Calling someone stupid because of a phobia is stupid. To cancel a holiday (or parts of it) because of a worry might be somewhat of an overreaction though.


  6. #26

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    Wow, i really wasn't expecting that Moving! Sorry for being such a weak idiot. I did mention i find it embarassing, and i am trying to deal with it, and have actively tried different approaces. And I have a vague idea of a trauma that might have cause it, since i clearly remember that as a child i was not afraid and was even trying to find poisonous ones( in a country that doesn't have any). I also find people who are afraid of flying to be quite silly but i wouldn't go as far as calling them idiots. And the reason i decided to better cancel a night and just do a day trip is for safety reasons. I cannot afford to totally freak out, scream, jump, run and have a panic attack while holding a baby. If it's not something i can have any control over despite trying i'd rather not take the risk. I had a couple of spiders on me once in a car on a highway in UK. Luckily i wasn't driving and my husband kept his cool while my
    FIL who's car it was, couldn't stop laughing. It's not something i'd like to go through again.

    pinkelephant likes this.

  7. #27

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    Quote Originally Posted by virago:
    I've resisted from saying something....till now.

    People have it too good. While millions fight every day about securing food to live someone comes online to rant about a couple of spiders might jump out of the sky onto them and ruin their holiday!

    I think the OP needs to get perspective and also take a look at herself.
    My family used to queue for 12 hours to secure a kilo of flour so don't lecture me on food scarcity in the world. And i assume you don't live in a tent, struggle to get food everyday and wear your grandfathers clothes just so you can empathize better with those millions. And just because i rant about a few spiders doesn't mean i am unaware or indiferent to the suffering of others.
    pinkelephant likes this.

  8. #28

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    Quote Originally Posted by fianna:
    My family used to queue for 12 hours to secure a kilo of flour so don't lecture me on food scarcity in the world. And i assume you don't live in a tent, struggle to get food everyday and wear your grandfathers clothes just so you can empathize better with those millions. And just because i rant about a few spiders doesn't mean i am unaware or indiferent to the suffering of others.
    Yes but I'm not frightened of some silly spiders and pick a place for a holiday which has some of the biggest in the world. It's like the Pope thinking he would like to have a holiday in Egypt to see the pyramids and then realising it's full of Muslims.

    May I offer a suggestion. Following are some of the normal spiders in Borneo. Print these out (or better ones) and place them around the house. You will see them everyday. It will be uncomfortable but once you get used to it. It will become second nature then you once you do see them anywhere else you will not go freaky.

    Good luck and I am sure you won't see them anyway but better be prepared in any case.









  9. #29
    Quote Originally Posted by virago:
    I've resisted from saying something....till now.

    People have it too good. While millions fight every day about securing food to live someone comes online to rant about a couple of spiders might jump out of the sky onto them and ruin their holiday!

    I think the OP needs to get perspective and also take a look at herself.
    i wish you would have continued to resist.
    totally irrelevant post really.

    we have had people rant about their mac dying on them and taking us through their entire day about it and how promptly a new one was bought instead.
    now if you would have brought up your viewpoint above then..i might have agreed with you.

    what has phobia got to do with being thankless about a good life one has!

  10. #30

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    Quote Originally Posted by pinkelephant:
    i wish you would have continued to resist.
    totally irrelevant post really.

    we have had people rant about their mac dying on them and taking us through their entire day about it and how promptly a new one was bought instead.
    now if you would have brought up your viewpoint above then..i might have agreed with you.

    what has phobia got to do with being thankless about a good life one has!
    Yeah, well, I might of overstepped a tad on the 'millions dying' comment but when people are worried about a few spiders it's just incredulous to me.

    Anyway I offered a suggestion which is A PROVEN first step of getting over a phobia. A gradual, open and repeated exposure in a safe and controlled way.

    By avoiding she will have till her dying days so face up to it now.

    This is how I got over my Cherophobia.
    Last edited by virago; 27-08-2011 at 04:28 PM.