Working In HK Average Salary

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  1. #71

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    While I agree with the points made above about supporting my parents if they needed it (obviously I would); I would do it because I WANT to and NOT because I think that I have an "obligation to them for raising me". I strongly object to this notion. My parents had me because THEY wanted to. I had no choice in the matter. If I hated my parents, I wouldn't support them even if they needed it - it's my choice! Luckily - 1) they don't need it and 2) I love them - but having children just so there is somebody "obliged" to support you in old age is extremely selfish! A personal pension plan would have been just as effective.


  2. #72

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    Quote Originally Posted by MovingIn07:
    While I agree with the points made above about supporting my parents if they needed it (obviously I would); I would do it because I WANT to and NOT because I think that I have an "obligation to them for raising me". I strongly object to this notion. My parents had me because THEY wanted to. I had no choice in the matter. If I hated my parents, I wouldn't support them even if they needed it - it's my choice! Luckily - 1) they don't need it and 2) I love them - but having children just so there is somebody "obliged" to support you in old age is extremely selfish! A personal pension plan would have been just as effective.
    No it is not selfish. it is a matter for many poor countries (and china is one - although developping fast) of survival.

    That is somehow becuase you come from the land of the plenty and they (the old generation) come fromthe land of "nothing". You tend to forget that while HK is a developped city it is just next to china where a vast majority of the population is from.

    Having kids and having kids with good job for family who had nothing (I am talking about folks who are 45/60 years old now) is/was a way of survival....

    That is now less the truth and you can see that kids are already giving less now to their parents that their own parents used to do.....
    Last edited by Mat; 24-09-2009 at 03:23 PM.

  3. #73

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    The point I was making was that if parents spent the money they saved from not having kids in a retirement fund (which are certainly available here in Hong Kong!) then they would have something to support them in their old age which does not have two legs and a mind of its own. If you are an independent person, you are not a bank.


  4. #74

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    Quote Originally Posted by MovingIn07:
    The point I was making was that if parents spent the money they saved from not having kids in a retirement fund (which are certainly available here in Hong Kong!) then they would have something to support them in their old age which does not have two legs and a mind of its own. If you are an independent person, you are not a bank.
    Moving you are talking about NOW.

    Folks that are 25/30 y old and give to their parents are giving to a generation that DID NOT HAVE retirment funds available at the time, or was only accessible to a minority of wealthy people.

    I am pretty sure the next generation will give less to their parents and parents will expect less from their kids (example around me tend to support that view).

  5. #75

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    Had to comfort one stressed-out friend those "filial piety" started with helped out her mother. But her mother then insisted that she (my friend) also give money to her older brother, who had lost his job and couldn't pay the mortgage for his property on the Mainland, and her sister, whose business had pretty much crapped out.

    She could barely afford food, let alone her rent, but she felt she had to help her siblings as her mother had asked her to. She admitted that, if the situation was reversed, neither sibling would return the favour. When she told her mother she couldn't afford to support the whole family, her mother's response was to earn more money.

    She found it very hard to go against the parental conditioning.


  6. #76

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    MI07, I think you are applying western ideals to the impractical situations of yesteryear in a culture which is foreign to you.

    The Chinese culture is based strongly on the family unit and on Confucian filial piety principles. Filial piety is a moral obligation on Chinese and anyone who does not demonstrate this is socially condemned. The best example of this is the last emperor, and indeed many examples of previous emperors, who theoretically had absolute power but were bound by filial piety to at least show respect to the wishes of preceding emperors. In the last emperor's case, actual power was in the hands of the dowager CiXi.

    It is more out of filial piety that Chinese necessarily or provide token support to their parents.

    And of course Mat is right, things like pension planning was non-existent in my parents' day. In my parents' day, pension planning was effectively providing sufficient support to your kids so that they can provide for you in the future. This is still practiced today in rural areas of China where many kids are expected to provide for their parents due to the non-existent pension schemes.

    Last edited by ray98; 24-09-2009 at 03:49 PM.

  7. #77

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    Quote Originally Posted by Claire ex-ax:
    Had to comfort one stressed-out friend those "filial piety" started with helped out her mother. But her mother then insisted that she (my friend) also give money to her older brother, who had lost his job and couldn't pay the mortgage for his property on the Mainland, and her sister, whose business had pretty much crapped out.

    She could barely afford food, let alone her rent, but she felt she had to help her siblings as her mother had asked her to. She admitted that, if the situation was reversed, neither sibling would return the favour. When she told her mother she couldn't afford to support the whole family, her mother's response was to earn more money.

    She found it very hard to go against the parental conditioning.

    Cos if your brother was broke you would not help him?

  8. #78

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    Quote Originally Posted by Claire ex-ax:
    Had to comfort one stressed-out friend those "filial piety" started with helped out her mother. But her mother then insisted that she (my friend) also give money to her older brother, who had lost his job and couldn't pay the mortgage for his property on the Mainland, and her sister, whose business had pretty much crapped out.

    She could barely afford food, let alone her rent, but she felt she had to help her siblings as her mother had asked her to. She admitted that, if the situation was reversed, neither sibling would return the favour. When she told her mother she couldn't afford to support the whole family, her mother's response was to earn more money.

    She found it very hard to go against the parental conditioning.
    This is part of the culture thing too. If you are doing very well, and your siblings are not, you are expected to help them out. Some of my friends send money back, some even pay for their siblings' down payment of a new condo. What's worse is that parents often want to get in the discussion and force the issue. However, because of the one-child policy, this is becoming less frequent.

    You really need to understand the culture, the sacrifice chinese parents are willing to make for their kids.

  9. #79

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    Quote Originally Posted by ray98:
    MI07, I think you are applying western ideals to the impractical situations of yesteryear in a culture which is foreign to you.

    The Chinese culture is based strongly on the family unit and on Confucian filial piety principles. Filial piety is a moral obligation on Chinese and anyone who does not demonstrate this is socially condemned. The best example of this is the last emperor, and indeed many examples of previous emperors, who theoretically had absolute power but were bound by filial piety to at least show respect to the wishes of preceding emperors. In the last emperor's case, actual power was in the hands of the dowager CiXi.

    It is more out of filial piety that Chinese necessarily or provide token support to their parents.

    And of course Mat is right, things like pension planning was non-existent in my parents' day. In my parents' day, pension planning was effectively providing sufficient support to your kids so that they can provide for you in the future. This is still practiced today in rural areas of China where many kids are expected to provide for their parents due to the non-existent pension schemes.
    Could not have said better Ray.

  10. #80

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    Quote Originally Posted by md23:
    However, because of the one-child policy, this is becoming less frequent.

    .
    What one child policy would you be speaking of, in the context that we live in Hong Kong...?

    Last thing I heard, the esteemed Bow Tie of HK, has asked us all to have 3 children, so they (The HKSAR Govt ) can balance their cheque book, in a manner that they are accustomed, down the track.
    Last edited by Skyhook; 24-09-2009 at 03:59 PM.

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