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Should we stay or go?

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  1. #41

    There are people who are so glad they left and there are people who swear they will never leave this city. You'll never know until you actually do it... but bear in mind each city has its own drawbacks and they may not necessarily be obvious at first!

    shri, kktjia, jdf21st and 1 others like this.

  2. #42

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    well, so many left and still stuck to this website like their daily bread.. what does that say ?

    rani, kktjia, Kowloon72 and 2 others like this.

  3. #43

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    Quote Originally Posted by freeier:
    well, so many left and still stuck to this website like their daily bread.. what does that say ?
    Means we made long life friends in Hong Kong and retain an interest in its present and future?

    Those who carp about non-residents posting on here - what does that say?
    Skyhook, john_1122, bdw and 9 others like this.

  4. #44

    Join Date
    Aug 2007
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    Happiness is overrated.


  5. #45

    Join Date
    Aug 2007
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    Quote Originally Posted by HK_Katherine:
    Make a decision. Agree it with partner. Don't tell anyone else. Sleep on it. If you sleep well, implement it. If you toss and turn all night, revisit in the morning. Your subconscious knows what is best, you just have to find a way to access it.
    The subconscious is just behind the third eye.

  6. #46

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    Jul 2006
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    3,747

    I'd love the opportunity to move to Switzerland and with the recent referendum on free movement (although as we know they kept the freedom) it only goes to show that these windows can and do close.

    Some places are much more difficult to get into than others. Switzerland is difficult to get into now, and with good reason, it has such a beautiful way of life, especially in an ever more environmentally troubled world.

    HK is very easy to get into for you now so it's easy to return.

    I'd grab the new opportunity with both hands, and maybe our paths will cross on the Matterhorn someday.

    jdf21st and Elegiaque like this.

  7. #47

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    Jan 2018
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    Is it possible to let your husband go, try out the new job (see if he likes it, and likes living there), you stay behind, keeping the present job. If, after six months or so, he is confident that it is good, the new country is good, prospects for you in that country are good, etc. THEN you follow. If it is not all that, he transfers back to HK and your work is not interrupted.

    The cautious side of me says if it's possible to try it out without resigning from a job you like, then do it, even if means living apart for a bit. Why uproot the cats if it turns out to be a bad fit? You never know when transferring locations, even if the same company.

    Coolboy, Sage, mysti and 6 others like this.

  8. #48

    Made that move last summer - for possibly a number of reasons but it in reality only a few - and it’s worked out mostly really well for us (main difference: we have kids). But think the comments along the lines of it being more about you as humans than location are key.
    But Europe is just f*ck*ng fantastic and main thing we missed. Even Blighty’s pretty good, despite.... everything.

    PS: keep credit cards in whatever location you can - took us nearly a year to get one in UK (despite having worked for a v v large international FI, ffs) but we’d been away for 21 years.

    Last edited by jdf21st; 07-10-2020 at 05:41 AM.

  9. #49

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    Oct 2012
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    6,266
    Quote Originally Posted by MABinPengChau:
    Is it possible to let your husband go, try out the new job (see if he likes it, and likes living there), you stay behind, keeping the present job. If, after six months or so, he is confident that it is good, the new country is good, prospects for you in that country are good, etc. THEN you follow. If it is not all that, he transfers back to HK and your work is not interrupted.

    The cautious side of me says if it's possible to try it out without resigning from a job you like, then do it, even if means living apart for a bit. Why uproot the cats if it turns out to be a bad fit? You never know when transferring locations, even if the same company.
    Yes, I'm trying to relax a bit and keep this in mind. It's all forced me to think carefully about what I want in life and there's always some pressure to "do what I really want to do" when I move, and I'm kind of tired of this as what I have going now makes me pretty happy (especially since we're online). I'm pretty sure dream careers of mine could never be realized in Europe.

    Yes it's true we can come and go and we have money and freedom, but actually I realized something really bothers me about this: I love gardening and it's really important to me. We continually feel unable to buy anywhere we're at -- CH is the worst. Even if you wanted to buy -- you can't! There are no places! I am a bit emotionally attached to my plants and am not sure I can come to terms with a lifetime of continually having to separate from them. (Sounds crazy, but if you saw my rooftop you'd understand...) There's ways to deal with this, like focusing on vegetable gardening, but it's still some life goal of mine to have a little place to call my own and see grow over years.

    But yes, I will stay put and don't need to make any decision initially. I can write to potential employers there and see if any doors open. If they do, fine, I can go.

    I worry so much that life back in Europe will be pretty boring. Once upon a time it was an exciting, new, beautiful foreign place to me. I found the people interesting and enjoyed learning about their culture. Now it may seem quite banal and restrictive. @jdf21st you don't think it's boring and plain?

  10. #50

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    I hear you, I bought a flat in the Tokyo suburbs for the "massive" 300 square foot garden off the patio on the ground floor- great for letting cats out as well as planting a Japanese-style garden that I was sad to part with when I moved to HK. Although I had a giant rooftop 500 square foot balcony with views to die for on Peng Chau, I was afraid to start a massive garden due to the incredible watering commitment (very sunny and windy, dries potted plants out fast, what to do when traveling, etc.). Feel guilty that I never really used the space to its potential, especially when viewing some awesome gardens from neighbors.

    It's a lot to uproot yourself if you are not sure of an improvement in life- I regret my move back to the US as I was pretty happy in my former job in HK, but for some reason felt I should move back to the US and put in more time on my social security in order to receive a larger monthly check when I retire and also to be nearer to family. Well, most of the family couldn't give two hoots about where I lived only my mother...so I wasted 5 years back in the states and two of those were about the most miserable of my life (long story).
    Therefore I am the first person to say that if you are relatively happy, then don't risk a good thing. My move to TW involves the same job, same people so low risk. But sad that the original plan was to more or less split time between TW and HK and, in coronavirus reality, this is not actually possible for the foreseeable future. Hoping that some coworkers will keep the Peng Chau flat, I am still paying while my cats serve their 6 month waiting period to come to TW. After that, not sure if the current coworker will want to share it with friends and split the rent, or will move back home to save money. It's such a fabulous and unique place, I have spent a total of 4 years on Peng Chau and will never find something I like as much unless I win the lottery and buy something with a similarly fabulous view in Hawaii.

    kktjia, jgl and mrgoodkat like this.

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