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helper on the run?

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  1. #11

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    I'm just curious how you brought two kids into the world who you can't manage to take care of on your own? Parents all over the world are taking their kids on trips on their own.

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  2. #12

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elegiaque:
    I'm just curious how you brought two kids into the world who you can't manage to take care of on your own? Parents all over the world are taking their kids on trips on their own.
    Couldn't agree more
    My mother brought up 5 kids single handed and ran a business when my father died.

    No maids back then.

  3. #13

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    Original Post Deleted
    It's just my opinion. I've been quite shocked to learn through this forum how people outsource parenting to domestic helpers (like teeth brushing?!). It's just my opinion/belief that if people are going to bring more humans onto this earth, they need to take a lot of personal responsibility for them. I know other people have different opinions, and I know each persons situation is unique with different priorities.

    But in this case, I can imagine the helper might be glad for an opportunity to travel aboard and see a completely new side of the world... it could be a great opportunity.

  4. #14

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    Quote Originally Posted by merchantms:
    Well it's the OP's choice.
    To take possession of their employee's passport? No, it's not.
    To bring them w/them, yes, that's the OP's choice. But not to hold onto the DH's passport. If Canada is like I assume it is - like the US, just better, if colder - then the employer has no right to take possession of their employee's passport. And the employee is free to choose to leave their employer.
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  5. #15

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bob Loblaw:
    To take possession of their employee's passport? No, it's not.
    To bring them w/them, yes, that's the OP's choice. But not to hold onto the DH's passport. If Canada is like I assume it is - like the US, just better, if colder - then the employer has no right to take possession of their employee's passport. And the employee is free to choose to leave their employer.
    If my employer asked me to go on an extended business trip and then I heard they were considering hiding my passport from me while we traveled I think I would be looking for a new employer PDQ.
    Last edited by East_coast; 14-02-2015 at 04:47 PM.
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  6. #16

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    @bobLoblaw I guess you wish to ignore the rest of my post so fine.

    I would not take a helpers passport, I have said that already. OP is freaking out that her DH will run away, that is the only way to ensure she doesn't! You can't own a human being obviously.

    My family who have taken helpers on vacation come from a much poorer country than Hong Kong with much more incentive of running away. If you are a good employer, it won't happen.


  7. #17

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    I know that the vast majority of the world copes without helpers but if they could afford to would they? We had a helper in HK and in the Philippines but don't in the UK. Is this because we have changed our views on helpers and now consider it modern slavery. No, it is because we can't afford one in the UK.

    Completely off topic but did you know someone working 36 hours a week on minimum wage in the UK would put you in the top 10% of earners in the world?

    East_coast, hullo and chingleutsch like this.

  8. #18

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    If I've understood you correctly, you're saying that you wouldn't personally hold a helper's passport, but that you understand why other people do, and can sympathize with them for holding their helper's passport. To me, that doesn't cut it. But,If I've misunderstood you, correct me.

    I see someone who holds onto their helper's passport as a wannabe slave owner. I have no sympathy for them at all. They are violating the human rights of their employees, and they are violating the laws of many of the nations they would be visiting.


  9. #19

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bob Loblaw:
    If I've understood you correctly, you're saying that you wouldn't personally hold a helper's passport, but that you understand why other people do, and can sympathize with them for holding their helper's passport. To me, that doesn't cut it. But,If I've misunderstood you, correct me.
    If as the OP my primary concern were that my helper would run off if I take her on vacation, I would either:

    A) not take the helper
    B) take the helper's passport to ensure she doesn't run

    Given that she is claiming inability to manage a month in Canada without the helper, then she only has one option. It's not a good one.

    Otherwise she can offer a bonus or other incentive, this still cannot ensure she doesn't run but if she is a good employee then she will feel valued in such a case and not run off.

    My grandma has had helpers run from her home city many times because (I love her but being honest) she is not the best employer and is harsh with them. Other relatives have had the same helpers for 20 years. As you might imagine my grandma does not bring any helper with her when she travels, the others do with no problem.
    hullo likes this.

  10. #20

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    Even if you keep the helper's passport, she can run if she feels she will have better opportunities

    hullo likes this.