Friendship issue

[Beuze]

By the way, you are all invited to my wedding, just send your cheques to ...

First you have to send us all an invitation with a 20 bucks bill inside !!

If it's Yum cha restaurant 500hkd if you go 188hkd if you don't.

Make sure to write your name on the red packet, My first wedding i didn't put my name on the packet and the newly wed laugh telling me we know how much you give us your were the only one not puting your name on the packet !

[xpatinhk]

Thank you all for your input.

So an update.. I called my friend asking if we could meet up because I wanted to give her a red packet. She said I could hold on to it until her wedding banquet later in the year. So silly me, I assumed that the wedding ceremony + yum char was all that she was going to do for the wedding.

I am still a bit puzzled as to why I was invited to both because as I've said, we only met once more thank a year ago plus from her email list, I am pretty sure the yum char is for close family and friends.

I am curious, however, for those who get invited to both, do you pay $188-$500 (I was going to pay $500 so I wouldn't offend) for the yumchar and then pay $1000 again for the banquet later in the year?

[jimbo]

Pay $188 for the yum cha and leave it at that.
Don't mention future events either and fingers crossed you'll be forgotten about in the next round of invites.

[wayland]

Indeed, but I have no desire to gouge all my friends and acquaintances for money just because I choose to get married. Such celebrations as there were of our wedding (and adjacent birthdays) were at my expense.

I agree with PDLM. It sickens me how the events that come with a marriage have become fund raisers for the newlyweds. In the good old days, stag parties meant going out with the guys/girls for a good time. Nowadays, they've become Jack and Jill parties where the guests are constantly pressured into donating money and gifts for the couple.

This custom of having to pay even if you're not attending is the most ridiculous and encourages the practice of inviting everyone under the sun.

[UK/HKboy]

iv never given red packets to weddings i did not go to! i never heard about that unless its close family?

however, u sometimes get the Maxims cake vouchers in the invitations and cos i saved up a few, i managed to get myself a big ass cake for christmas

[joey_bear]

iv never given red packets to weddings i did not go to! i never heard about that unless its close family?

however, u sometimes get the Maxims cake vouchers in the invitations and cos i saved up a few, i managed to get myself a big ass cake for christmas

But I think as local you are supposed to pay as long as you receive the invitation. Well.... But I guess you can just pretend you are foreigner and dont know this tradition keke~~ I guess they wont mind...