HK Etiquette: should I attend wedding banquet?

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  1. #1

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    HK Etiquette: should I attend wedding banquet?

    Hi all

    My husband and I have been invited to the wedding of one of his colleagues. I have never met the guy. In Australia, I would consider that I was probably only invited out of politeness, and would probably politely decline, saving him what I know is a considerable per head cost! However I understand in Hong Kong the tradition is to invite EVERYBODY to the wedding, and that the more people turn up, the more successful the celebration. Is this outdated, or still true? Should I go? I do love a banquet!

    Can any local HK people who've invited colleagues and their wives shed some light - would you be hoping for a few less RSVPs, or the more the merrier?


  2. #2

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    have you been invited to the "wedding" or to the wedding banquet?

    there is a huge difference. i have received both types of invites here in HK.

    if you've been invited to the wedding banquet then go if you like. the custom is $500/person if you attend the banquet and $300/person if you don't...


  3. #3

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    Wedding banquet. And thanks for answering my next question too...


  4. #4

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    no problem, enjoy...


  5. #5

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    oh most definitely go to the banquet if invited...Chinese people love having huge banquets because it's a show of "face". just be advised that if it's traditionally done, it will involve more than three hours generally amidst a din of noise and a few hundred faces...and be sure to not wear black or any other somber colours, generally the brighter your clothing the more auspicious it is.

    have fun!


  6. #6

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    No idea if it works like in Shanghai, but wedding banquets there are too bad for my health. Everyone smokes and cigarettes are a traditional gifts. Also you have to drink a lot of bai jiu.
    I avoid wedding banquets EVERYTIME I'm invited.


  7. #7

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    Good idea to give lucky money as a wedding gift. That is how you kind of help pay for your stop. I am going to a wedding tomorrow and thats what locals advised me to do.


  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by carang:
    the custom is $500/person if you attend the banquet and $300/person if you don't...
    Is that right, you are expected to pay even if you don't attend and don't know the person?

  9. #9

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    MORE insight

    esque

    Quote Originally Posted by HKChigger:
    Good idea to give lucky money as a wedding gift. That is how you kind of help pay for your stop. I am going to a wedding tomorrow and thats what locals advised me to do.
    It's a "gift" in cash, though it comes with a meaning of luck, it's not "lucky money"

    Quote Originally Posted by Bobbybo:
    No idea if it works like in Shanghai, but wedding banquets there are too bad for my health. Everyone smokes and cigarettes are a traditional gifts. Also you have to drink a lot of bai jiu.
    I avoid wedding banquets EVERYTIME I'm invited.
    Drink anything you want, alcoholic / non-alcoholic. We are encouraging a non-smoking environment here in HK, I didn't see loads of ppl smoking at their table at my sister's wedding last month, they all went out to the lobby for the drag


    Quote Originally Posted by ingenue:
    oh most definitely go to the banquet if invited...Chinese people love having huge banquets because it's a show of "face". just be advised that if it's traditionally done, it will involve more than three hours generally amidst a din of noise and a few hundred faces...and be sure to not wear black or any other somber colours, generally the brighter your clothing the more auspicious it is.

    have fun!
    yes, we show off, but sometimes it's also out of polite coz the colleague is inviting most of the ppl at the office, so the foreigner and family are invited. Sometimes we are after the "gift money" to pay the expenses for the banquet...

    if you've never been to any, should give it a shot, may surprise you! Good Luck

  10. #10

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    Hopefully, I wont get shot down for this, but I think it is mostly 'Western" weddings were people care about keeping the numbers who attend to a certain figure (usually because of the astronomical costs involved in organising a wedding). Every other wedding I have been invited to involving people of African, Indian (and now Chinese) origin has been about getting as many people as possible to share in the big day. I'd definately say go ...


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