How much time have you got....when's the wedding?
Despite what is seen in the typical hollywood movie, I suggest you try not to steal the spotlight and be the centre of attention with crude jokes or embarrassing stories. (humour is good, but awkward silences and fart jokes, hooker stories etc are not). If you screw up the day or embarrass the bride, you may find she will not easily forgive and forget.
You need to be the "go-to guy" if anything goes wrong, limo driver needs to be paid, suits made, transportation arranged etc you should take care of it before the bride/groom even know there is a problem.
Don't have the Bachelor party one or two nights before the wedding if possible. Black eyes, bloodshot eyes etc do not make for great wedding photos.
Once the formalities are over and the Bride and Groom are gone then you are expected and required to get absolutely smashed and hit on bridesmaids - that is your right as the Best Man.
Assuming that this is not handled by the wedding planner. NEVER mess with the wedding planner (watch the movie Father of the Bride... )You need to be the "go-to guy" if anything goes wrong, limo driver needs to be paid, suits made, transportation arranged etc you should take care of it before the bride/groom even know there is a problem.
I think the first you do is to sit downand find out what the groom (and bride) expect of you.
Some expect MC too, some do not. Some want a toast to the bride only from best man and others want the speech about how great your buddy is.
The starting point is expectations so you can see if it is feasible for you. If not, just get out of it and note you will be traveling and don't want to wreck the wedding.
Though I've never been a best man but I have been the groom. The groom will be half-dead most of the day only capable of smiling and bowing and not much else. The best man will carry his wallet, mobile phone and ID card and follow the groom wherever he goes.
Before picking the bride:
- Be the first one up in the morning, making sure the groom is on time.
- Make sure the other lazy groomsmen don't come late.
- Make sure the ring, and "open door laisee" is ready. There needs to be two lai sees. One for opening the gate to the bride's apartment, and one for the bride's room.
- Make sure the transportation to the bride's place is ready and on time and the driver knows how to get there.
- Make sure you have the laisees to tip all the staff for the day (i.e. drivers, waiters, wedding planner, make up artist, photographers, band, florists, etc)
- Make sure the groom's change of clothes are prepared and that they are transported along with the groom's transport.
- Make sure the bride's wedding bouquet is ready.
At The Bride's :
- Protect the groom from abuse from the bridesmaids.
- Attempt to avoid having the groom to play those silly bridesmaid's games.
- Make sure the photographers are on time.
At the Ceremony (if any):
- Make sure the ring is ready
- Make sure the other groomsmen do their duty (i.e. collect gifts from guests and secure them, guide guests to their seats, etc)
At the banquet/cocktail:
- Ready to give the best man speech (if any)
- Make sure you know where the groom is at any point in time.
- Make sure he is reminded of what he needs to do and where he should be.
- Make sure the staff are tipped.
Pretty much have it covered. Good luck.
Thank you everything for your comments. Really appreciated it. Just got off the phone with my buddy and basically i am in charge of the ring, collecting all the red envelopes from customers at the end of the night, a toast/speech to about 500 guest, and bachlor party.
so any of you exp folks want to contribute some ideas as to where we can have this bachlor party at? Las Vegas just seems kind of play out since we use to travel there a few times a year. Any other suggestions??