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Helper dilemma - what would you do?

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  1. #31

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    Quote Originally Posted by AtomicBunnie:
    I was speaking from PERSONAL experience. You might be one of the luckier ones. Who knows? I am entitled to my own observations and opinion. If you don't like it that's your problem. To ignore the fact that many singletons AND Expat families here have had problems with Domestic Helpers is akin to being an Ostrich with your head in the sand.
    Good employers tend to end up with good employees and visa versa. While there are always bad apples, a poor employer-employee relationship is usually a product of both sides.
    eIIe, hullexile and gigglinggal like this.

  2. #32

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    Quote Originally Posted by HK_Katherine:
    Good employers tend to end up with good employees and visa versa. While there are always bad apples, a poor employer-employee relationship is usually a product of both sides.
    Eh that’s not always true. I’ve had a horrible helper who lied constantly, “borrowed” stuff from other helpers in the building that she never gave back (aka stole) and took out a huge loan then ran away. I’m not going to say all Filipinas are x because of one bad experience but it’s not the case that if you’re a good employer you’ll have a good helper.
    AtomicBunnie likes this.

  3. #33

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    Quote Originally Posted by merchantms:
    Eh that’s not always true. I’ve had a horrible helper who lied constantly, “borrowed” stuff from other helpers in the building that she never gave back (aka stole) and took out a huge loan then ran away. I’m not going to say all Filipinas are x because of one bad experience but it’s not the case that if you’re a good employer you’ll have a good helper.
    This provides a good balance to all the good Filipinas out there.

  4. #34

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    Original Post Deleted
    It sounded genuine to me.

  5. #35

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    Original Post Deleted
    I read the post, and I still commented. I'll note that I believe neither you nor HK_Katherine has a helper so I don't know how seriously to take your view honestly. Many of these women come from unstable environments and if there's a financial/medical/personal emergency back home, their attitude and behavior can change quite quickly. It often has absolutely nothing to do with the employer/employee relationship.

    The one I had a bad experience was actually good at her job, but her personal life was a mess and it led to the problems e.g. stealing and borrowing massive amounts of money then realizing no way she could pay it back.
    Mat likes this.

  6. #36

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    Quote Originally Posted by AtomicBunnie:
    I was speaking from PERSONAL experience. You might be one of the luckier ones. Who knows? I am entitled to my own observations and opinion. If you don't like it that's your problem. To ignore the fact that many singletons AND Expat families here have had problems with Domestic Helpers is akin to being an Ostrich with your head in the sand.
    But you didn't stop at your limited personal experience but used that to generalise 200,000 people. You don't see a problem with that?
    gigglinggal likes this.

  7. #37

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    Quote Originally Posted by merchantms:
    I read the post, and I still commented. I'll note that I believe neither you nor HK_Katherine has a helper so I don't know how seriously to take your view honestly. Many of these women come from unstable environments and if there's a financial/medical/personal emergency back home, their attitude and behavior can change quite quickly. It often has absolutely nothing to do with the employer/employee relationship.

    The one I had a bad experience was actually good at her job, but her personal life was a mess and it led to the problems e.g. stealing and borrowing massive amounts of money then realizing no way she could pay it back.
    The strange thing is that in much of the rest of the world Filipino workers are highly regarded, so the question for me is why does Hong Kong have this problem?
    juanalias likes this.

  8. #38

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    Quote Originally Posted by hullexile:
    The strange thing is that in much of the rest of the world Filipino workers are highly regarded, so the question for me is why does Hong Kong have this problem?
    Like I said - she was a good helper! I was so disappointed to find out all what she was doing in the background.

    We're pretty typical expat employers - pay above minimum, no unreasonable hours or work demands, pay extra trips home, etc. Among my friend group with the same makeup there are still quite a lot of these stories.

    I think Hong Kong is a competitive, materialistic city and the same pressures that can cause gweilos to break bad might apply to Filipinos too.

  9. #39

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    Original Post Deleted
    I think Japan works under a very different model when it comes to helpers :

    Japan shuns Hong Kong model as it prepares to get its first foreign maids | South China Morning Post

    They are employed by the agency, must find their own place to live, paid equivalent wages to their Japanese counterparts, 200 hours of training, and can only stay up to three years. I imagine it's mainly the fairly well-to-do that can afford to hire them.

  10. #40

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    Almost certainly at that wage level they would have to live out. So I'm not sure that it would make the problem disappear. It's not easy to live on $15K a month in Hong Kong especially if the intention is to send money back home as well.