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Any happy housewife in HK with no kids?

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  1. #21

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    If you couldn't get a job here, why not start up a business? China is the land of opportunity for sourcing items cheap and selling on to the west for profit, whether large scale or Etsy sized.

    Get yourself down to the Garment District in Sham Shui Po if you are into interior decor, not only is there a world of opportunity there for a business, the place is often frequented by Western women.

    Every time I go there I strike up a conversation with expat women browsing the fabric stalls. There is little English spoken there, but if you are interested in learning the ropes, do as I did and employ a local to interpret for you for a few hours. Now I understand the processes, who will sell what and in what quantities, I have no problems even with no Cantonese above a few polite phrases.

    You don't have to like the place you live in, it is possible to be happy here, just think outside the box you have created by limiting yourself to expensive restaurants and designer shops.


  2. #22

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    I'm in the same boat, but not so unhappy like yourself. I worked for 15 years before meeting my husband, moving countries and subsequently became severely burnt out. We moved here because my husband got promoted and myself not working, threw myself into learning about " our new home", and making the most of being a non working spouse. In the three years we have been here, like the majority of expats, I took the time to learn ( and forget) Cantonese, get to know locals as well as expats ( they are very nice people and so helpful!) , make friends that I found out later I actually didn't like and subsequently made new real friends I truly clicked with. Don't expect pristine environments wherever you move, unless you come from somewhere in Scandinavia ( not everything is pristine and perfect there either, I know) , but enjoy the quirks and learn to deal with the irks. In joining groups, I've met some interesting and lovely people. In fact, through this, I help out with one of the orchestras for their concerts, most recently having to chaperone the Vienna Boys Choir, plus doing pet sitting. There are some fantastic local restaurants that are cheap and atmospheric. HK is dense in many things, you just have to weave through the maze of options to find something to suit you.

    Have you tried hoping on a bus to somewhere just to check out what's at the other end? You may even like what you find? If not, then hop back on and head back to try another route...

    Last edited by Natfixit; 09-10-2013 at 01:28 PM.

  3. #23

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    If you are bored, I can help you get involved with volunteering through the AWA. PM for details if you are interested.


  4. #24

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    Buy an Xbox :P

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  5. #25

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    May 2005
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    hi,
    i have the impression that English is not your mother tongue? if so, perhaps you can find some friends from your country? I know of many hong kong Chinese married women with no children, or none at home. You will find education classes here (languages etc) full of them.

    mums with children do like childless friends, but sometimes look to them, for being fun-loving and positive and free, offering a different perspective on life-so you can't generalise there. look further..
    Your impressions of Hong Kong are many ppls impressions and were there before the mainlanders increased.

    good luck settling in.

    benenden00 likes this.

  6. #26

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    Original Post Deleted
    Sadly, DB ain't that pure and clean, smell free either. How about moving to a crumbling cum regentrifying village on south Lantau. Not necessarily Mui Wo, but one of the outlying villages. Buses are full of puking travel weary mainlander tourists, cabbies drive at breakneck speed dosed up to the eyeballs on blue girl beer and goodness what else but they are friendly and don't demand tips upon drop off, the locals will collect your rubbish to sell off for recycling, and maybe if you're lucky you may get the odd python to clean your drain out from rodents and other nasty things. Cobras to sort out the toad problem.

    People are friendly if you are friendly and helpful but mind your own business and own at least one feral dog or stray cat. Maybe this could be for you and your husband?
    Last edited by Natfixit; 09-10-2013 at 05:33 PM. Reason: Bloody typos added facts.
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  7. #27

    It's quite amusing a lot of people actually do read my stories and make a comment or two. My hubby will be home late tonight, he just whatsapped me. So it's good that I have this space to spill beans out. (Btw, after more than one year of living in HK, I discovered this site..in fact, only yesterday..)

    I think one of my problems is that I have a lot of fear. Did Franklin Roosevelt say "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."? I know it's good to meet people and get a chance to make friends but I find it hard to do it in real life. For instance, nassaugirl said she could help me get involved with volunteering- that's very nice of her, and I really do appreciate it. But I feel afraid of actually contacting her and meeting her. I don't know why. It's just my personality- many of you seem to be very active and outgoing, but I am not. I find it difficult to go out on my own and meet strangers in a strange environment.

    Louiseamanda is right- English is not my mother tongue, but I am not Chinese and I was educated in the UK. That's the hard part. I cannot associate myself with either Chinese people (though I have a number of good HK friends who studied with me in England- all of them who are back in HK work full-time and I am the only one without work, so it's really not easy to meet with them often) or native English speakers. Of course, I tried to find those housewives from my home country- funnily enough they are all married with kids and always busy. It's not easy to blend into that group without kids.

    That's why I posted this thread, looking for childless wives without work. I thought it might be better to find English speaking friends than my mother tongue speaking wives who have no common factors with me, apart from the fact that we are from the same country.

    It's easy to say to me "Get out and meet new people." but for some people, in this case 'me', it's very hard. And I am not a type who needs many friends- as you get older, you realise shallow friendship is not worth your time and energy. I just need a couple of really good friends to be happy. Last but not least, I am a quiet type and feel very uncomfortable in a noisy environment (never been out for clubbing or standing at a bar). So it takes time for me to open up.

    Based on all your comments, I think it might be the best to join a small group gathering first and see how it goes. I might need more courage to get myself involved in volunteering. FYI, I got these health problems in HK which I never experienced before and this made it even more difficult for me to go out and travel around the town. I am so horrified of insects and bugs in HK, as I have severe allergies to them. By coming over here, I lost my health (my skin got ruined...) and my mental, and this fact is what limits myself even more to my shelter, home.

    Last edited by benenden00; 09-10-2013 at 07:33 PM.

  8. #28

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    If you're reasonably fit physically then get out with a hiking group - it's a gret way to meet people, but also has the advantage that if there's no-one there you want to chat to then you can simply separate yourself a little and just enjoy the scenery and the exercise.

    There are several groups that function in English, but the two main ones with hikes for beginners, particularly on weekdays, are http://hongkonghikers.org and http://www.meetup.com/hongkonghikingmeetup/

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  9. #29

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gruntfuttock:
    If you're reasonably fit physically then get out with a hiking group - it's a gret way to meet people, but also has the advantage that if there's no-one there you want to chat to then you can simply separate yourself a little and just enjoy the scenery and the exercise.

    There are several groups that function in English, but the two main ones with hikes for beginners, particularly on weekdays, are http://hongkonghikers.org and http://www.meetup.com/hongkonghikingmeetup/
    I was about to post exactly the same thing (with the same links!). They offer weekday hikes too. Very little is involved, as Grunt said, you can interact as much as you like or just wander along at the back and not talk to anyone!

    Meetup.com also has MANY other groups - to cater for almost everything. Plenty of card games or word game groups, FOODIE groups (sounds like you might have something in common there) etc etc. If you go to a meetup for something you enjoy (or want to try) then it's not so much about the "meeting people" and more about the "thing" so you don't have to be social if you don't want to.

    But back to hiking - seriously - do something with EXERCISE in it. It's scientifically proven that exercise improves mood, so - not only will you get fitter and healthier and maybe meet people, but you'll also feel happier and THEN you might feel like trying something else.

    Also, the hiking meetups happen all over HK, mostly in NICE places. So you can find the best of HK rather than the worst of it.

    One final point.

    Reading your posts, you sound JUST like I felt when I lived in Kuala Lumpur 15 years ago. It was my first overseas move, I was working but I HATED KL with a passion. Hated the weather, the overflowing toilets, the lethargic people who never got anything done, the office secretary who prioritized any task given to her by a bloke (however junior) over anything given to her by a female (however senior!). And so on and so forth. In the end I just left. But in hindsight, it was ME that was the problem, not KL. I never really gave it a chance. If you can try to give HK a second go. There really are some great people here, some lovely scenery and fun to be had. But YOU have to make an effort. You really do. Make a small effort to start - go to a hike - get some exercise, the rest should follow.
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  10. #30

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    Benenden00,

    Hiking is a good tip as Grunfuttock has mentioned but insects and bugs come with it.

    Are you currently into any physical activities? Running is good but I found Hot Yoga a good way to rid me of my anxieties and I think it's supposed to be good for the Skin - Although I don't do it for that coz I'm a guy.

    benenden00 likes this.