i would suggest you look at clearwater bay or sai kung. you could also look at discovery bay.
clearwater bay/sai kung:
-it would take roughly 40 minutes by public transport to reach wanchai
- for $35K housing you could get a 2100' house with a garden & rooftop. you would probably get 4-5 bedrooms etc.
-your wife would be able to access shops in both sai kung & hang hau via public transport (if you lived in sai kung, then access to sai kung & hang hau are easy) if you live in clearwater bay, then hang hau is easy if you don't drive
-there are good international schools/playgroups around and also some very good local ones (kids learn cantonese as the mother tongue). my son goes to a local kindie and LOVES it. he is not the only mix in the class and there are 4-5 white faces in his class, too! once you have your visa, you can apply for the gov't voucher and school fees at his school are subsidised (we only pay $160/month!)
-small town feel in sai kung
-definitely away from the hustle and bustle, clearwater bay is more remote
-people either love it or hate it (i loved living there)
-a lot of expats, so VERY easy for wife and child to make friends
- housing more expensive than sai kung, but you could possibly get a smaller flat on the ground floor with a small garden
-garden not as big of a necessity as there are playgrounds in every village
-can join the residents' club if you don't mind the fees and access the playroom, billiards room, pool, tennis, squash, gym etc
-30 minute commute to central, then you'd have to add commute time to wanchai, maybe another 15-20 minutes, depending on traffic
i would strongly suggest you look at these areas when you get here and have a look at what's available in both. actually go see the flats/houses. so you know exactly what you are comparing.