Shatin, Tai po, Mah on shan, or others?

[IFC]

We have two kids, both boys, both toddlers and no DH. We refuse to outsource the raising of the kids. If they grow up to be axe-wielding maniacs, it will be our fault.
The mother is forced to spend the day in the house, with her baby, alone--horrors!!! And I am not sure why you would have to spend all day indoors, alone, with a baby. Seems like more of a choice than a necessity.
I'll stop before I really get on the soapbox.

Oh of course, mothers BELONG in the home behind an apron and a spatula in one hand and a baby in the other. How DARE women join the workforce when they have children!

BTW, what makes you think your children won't grow up to be axe-weilding maniacs with you raising them? And where can I find the study that claims that employing domestic helpers will result in axe-weilding maniac children?

[IFC]

Well that clearly hit a nerve.

Wow, what a well thought-out retort, you weren't just milking cows in Devon were you?

[IFC]

I am just guessing but perhaps the point is that we are not in our home country. See also the reasoning of having a domestic helper due to lack of day care centers etc.


Shouldn't it be for everyone himself to decide if they need (or want) a driver? Why does it seem to bother you so much?
I couldn't care less if someone "needs" a helicopter to do his gorcery shopping, their choice, their money.


Just for the record, I have neither a DH nor a helicopter. Aeh, I mean car & driver.

Well obviously he's jealous. Otherwise why the anger and bitterness? It's hilarious to me that someone would get so worked up because someone else has a car, so much to claim that person is "not in the right mind". Beckett couldn't write something as absurd as this.

[kryzlowski]

5 replies, and you're saying that I'm the one that is worked up?

You sarcastically critisise other's retorts, and yet the best you can come up with for me is "Don't be so smug, you'll have to find someone WILLING to have kids with you first". You don't know me, or my marital situation.

The last thing I will say on this, is please do not misquote me. Where on earth did I say it was a luxury to have a car? I also didn't say if you can walk to a bus stop in 30 mins then public transport is sufficent.

PS - IFC, it's a good thing you have a DH. That way your kids have less chance of turning out anything like your repugnant self. Now that is a 'well thought out retort'.

[Sleuth]

Oh of course, mothers BELONG in the home behind an apron and a spatula in one hand and a baby in the other. How DARE women join the workforce when they have children!

BTW, what makes you think your children won't grow up to be axe-weilding maniacs with you raising them? And where can I find the study that claims that employing domestic helpers will result in axe-weilding maniac children?

Our kids could grow up to be axe-wielding maniacs, but it would be our fault. I doubt there is an axe-wielding maniac-DH study. Might find a "little emperor-DH" study, though.
And I didn't say women have to be housewives. Women can make the choice.
However, I believe that the choice to raise the kids is at least equal in value to working and that sometimes the choice to work is more of a choice to accumulate money/stuff rather than a necessity.
Being a full-time mother is a job and it is harder than whatever the working world wants to throw at you. And it features less pay for more responsibility.

[MovingIn07]

Wow, what a well thought-out retort, you weren't just milking cows in Devon were you?

Oh my. And just how long did it take to think up that one? Were you too busy being driven around, perhaps, to do it earlier ?

[MovingIn07]

Our kids could grow up to be axe-wielding maniacs, but it would be our fault. I doubt there is an axe-wielding maniac-DH study. Might find a "little emperor-DH" study, though.
And I didn't say women have to be housewives. Women can make the choice.
However, I believe that the choice to raise the kids is at least equal in value to working and that sometimes the choice to work is more of a choice to accumulate money/stuff rather than a necessity.
Being a full-time mother is a job and it is harder than whatever the working world wants to throw at you. And it features less pay for more responsibility.

Nice response. Although I can hardly take seriously anyone who calls into question a desire to raise one's own children in the first place! I guess that must be what separates you and him - you actually appear to have wanted your children and have a desire to spend time with them yourself!

[Sleuth]

Although I can hardly take seriously anyone who calls into question a desire to raise one's own children in the first place!

Actually, I think I see that a lot here in HK (having but not wanting kids; or perhaps not realizing that raising kids is hard work).
And, to be fair, I taught at a private school in the US and often had the feeling that the parents had kids because it was the "in thing" to do in their social circle at that moment in their life. Or they were providing heirs to the name.
So, not just a HK attitude.

[MovingIn07]

Actually, I think I see that a lot here in HK (having but not wanting kids; or perhaps not realizing that raising kids is hard work).
And, to be fair, I taught at a private school in the US and often had the feeling that the parents had kids because it was the "in thing" to do in their social circle at that moment in their life. Or they were providing heirs to the name.
So, not just a HK attitude.

I don't disagree with your assessment although I do think it's unfortunate - at minimum for the poor children involved! We don't have children - mainly because having thought hard about it, we decided we don't want to and are not prepared to give it the 110% the children would deserve. We are certainly well off enough to have them and then farm out the raising but I just don't see that as an option - at minimum I think you should want your children and be prepared to give it your all! The worst, IMHO, are the celebrities who seem to see their children as the latest fashion accessory - but that particular beef is something of a diversion from this thread!

[timklip]

seems the anti-DH crowd here thinks that having one means completely ignoring your kids until the helper's day off, when you are then (horrors) forced to interact with your spawn...it is possible to enjoy raising your own children with the HELP of a DH (hence the name)...let's not paint it so black and white...