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My hubby is leaving today and I feel so heartbroken. This is the beginning of our move :(

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  1. #21

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    Oct 2005
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    Quote Originally Posted by erin320:
    Carang- I find this surprising from you. To be so unsympathetic of someone about to move and the nerve of them to miss home & friends. You say you're not being nasty, but your posts reads very much like an attack on her and the US. I know you are incredibly defensive about Hong Kong, but the OP never said anything negative about Hong Kong! Simply that she was going to miss her old life. Very normal and acceptable emotions even from someone who wants the adventure of expat life.
    Sorry but I have to agree with Cara on this.

    OP is coming in with a negative mind set and coming here with a negative mind set and a defeatist attitude is not going to help one iota.

    Yes she's leaving family and friends for an undetermined period, And obviously miss them dearly but with the advent of skype, whatsapp facebook etc etc it's easier to keep in touch than those that made the move say 15-20 years ago etc.

    OP treat this as a new adventure which it's going to be. HK is an easy place to meet friends and keep yourself busy by building up an active social network. The first few months will be tough whilst you're settling in but you'll be just fine.

    Chin up and once you're properly settled I'm sure we'll organize brunches and dinners etc.

  2. #22

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    Actually, regarding positive mental attitude, a short tale of someone here who caved in to negativity.
    A friend I knew here recently came back from her trip home (England) at Christmas and was just wallowing in misery. She'd been here less than a year. On her return to HK in January she was jetlagged, missing her friends & family and would sit posting on Facebook in the early hours of the morning how unhappy she was and moaning about HK.
    What didn't help were the friends back in England who pretty much begged her to come back. She ignored invitations from her friends here who really tried to get her out and cheer her up. Anyway, claiming her husband's company wanted him back in the UK, they had moved back to the UK by Easter, I didn't even get a goodbye from her.
    It was a real shame, if she had just let herself get out of that mindset I am convinced she'd be having a ball. (convinced because I'm sure a lot of us have moments where we'd just jack it all in and go, but we get past it)

    Molie, carang and bookblogger like this.

  3. #23

    Join Date
    Feb 2007
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    Quote Originally Posted by erin320:
    Carang- I find this surprising from you. To be so unsympathetic of someone about to move and the nerve of them to miss home & friends. You say you're not being nasty, but your posts reads very much like an attack on her and the US. I know you are incredibly defensive about Hong Kong, but the OP never said anything negative about Hong Kong! Simply that she was going to miss her old life. Very normal and acceptable emotions even from someone who wants the adventure of expat life.
    I'd actually say that I'm with Carang on this one. The OP sounded like a whiny teenager, not a grown woman. I went through exactly the same changes when we moved here, but my husband moved about 8 months before I did, so I can understand the OP's feelings, but not the general sulky adolescent tone. The best advice I can give the OP is that people do this all the time, and like others have noted communications and travel are cheap and easy these days so just get on with it like an adult.

  4. #24

    It's 10% about having a positive attitude and 90% about making enough money to buy good quality groceries, to own a motorcycle or car, to rent a good sized apartment that's close enough to work, to eat and drink well on weekends, and to take several holidays a year. Just a positive attitude gets you nowhere in this town.

    dear giant likes this.

  5. #25

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    Aug 2006
    Location
    tung chung, hong kong
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    having the positive attitude and being open to change means you can cope better with anything that comes your way.

    If you have children it is particularly important that you, as the adult, show a positive attitude as the kids will feed/bounce off you. If they see you down and miserable and not giving new things a chance, they will be the same.

    You will be busy packing/unpacking and working out your 'new home'. Time will fly when you do it in a positive cheerful way.

    Like others here, I know as i have done it a few times.


  6. #26

    Join Date
    Nov 2010
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    Quote Originally Posted by Char Siu King:
    It's 10% about having a positive attitude and 90% about making enough money to buy good quality groceries, to own a motorcycle or car, to rent a good sized apartment that's close enough to work, to eat and drink well on weekends, and to take several holidays a year. Just a positive attitude gets you nowhere in this town.
    You might need that 90% to feel good but it's def. not what every expat needs to 'get somewhere'...


    Sent from my GT-I9000 using GeoClicks Mobile

  7. #27

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    I think a few people are letting the crappy weather get to them this morning. OP sounds like she needs reassurance rather than insults like sulky adolescent or whiny teenager.
    Everyone's experience of moving is different, I had a particularly stressful move frpm Singapore to here despite having moved countries 4 times before (including in and out of Tokyo twice!).

    dear giant likes this.

  8. #28

    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Hong Kong
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    Wow, so many harsh (and even nasty) comments. She is only commenting she will be missing her husband for two months - very natural emotion when your other half won't be around (temporarily). It also means she has to settle and pack things up by herself (with two kids if I'm not mistaken) - definitely not easy to do (I did the same thing). I did not get the feeling she was complaining about her move to HK, just the fact that she will miss her husband.

    The two months will go quickly - I've been here about two years now and getting ready to pack things up (I feel I just arrived)! I am actually quite sad about it. I love Boston but am not ready to go back permanently just yet! Hong Kong has been the best experience for me and my family! So much to see and do here and in neighboring countries. Good luck!

    dear giant likes this.

  9. #29

    This is what happens when people post something like this in a couple of sentences, posters will jump to their own conclusions on what the OP means / feels / thinks !


  10. #30

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    Apr 2012
    Location
    Maoming, Guangdong, China
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    15

    Really????

    [QUOTE=TheBrit;1967089]I understand your feelings. You are leaving a first world country and coming to Hong Kong - a
    deeply flawed, incredibly unequal polluted little outpost of China. The only advice I can give is try to focus on the positives, ignore the many negatives and remember this is a temporary posting and that you can return to
    civilisation one day.

    Hey Brit! I am in China.....a bit like HK back in the 60's when spitting, littering and smoking were all around you. HK seems to me to be very much on a par with the UK and the US......and to me much more preferable.


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