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My hubby is leaving today and I feel so heartbroken. This is the beginning of our move :(

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  1. #41
    Quote Originally Posted by almightygoodgod:
    why do people come on here and post at all if all they are going to do is have a go at the poor woman? .
    Because we have nothing better to do?

  2. #42

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    Have to agree with that, agg.


  3. #43

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    OMG, folks! i was NOT being nasty in the least. i have reread my post about 10x after seeing the feedback it has generated.

    i DO have sympathy for the OP, BUT sympathy is NOT going to make moving any easier for her! it's only going to make moving more difficult. if she wants sympathy, as someone else suggested, facebook and her friends are where to get it from. come on geoexpat to ask questions for practical advice on how to deal with it.

    we have ALL been there, done that (moved overseas). we know how it feels.

    if you move with a positive attitude, life will be easier here.... do you all disagree with that??? seriously?

    ps> having a positive attitude while my entire family was sick? yes, i came on here and moaned about it. it wasn't fun. but i knew it would be all over soon. i also knew we were lucky. my son could have needed an operation to insert pins into his foot. thankfully, he didn't.... that doesn't mean i wasn't exhausted from dealing with them all AND running 2 businesses!

    Last edited by carang; 05-05-2012 at 01:15 PM.

  4. #44

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    This thread reminds me of when I was playing monopoly with my family as a child and my bro (then about 8) tried to cheat. A huge fight erupted and my brother said "i don't wanna play anymore" to which my dad replied angrily...

    "No. You're not going anywhere. We will FINISH this game, you will HAVE FUN, and you will SMILE!"

    Last edited by justjoe86; 05-05-2012 at 01:28 PM.
    carang and jgl like this.

  5. #45

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    Quote Originally Posted by almightygoodgod:
    @jgl: Too quick to criticise, that is an understatement. If people don't want to give sympathy that is fine, but why do people come on here and post at all if all they are going to do is have a go at the poor woman? It seem silly that people don't have the time or the motivation to help somebody but they do have the time and motivation to belittle their worries and troubles.
    People come here because they're bored, and the weather is currently a bit crap. In my case I'm also laid up sick in bed (yay!)

    I'd say that the general gist of advice here is actually pretty spot on- it's only two months, there are plenty of ways to keep in contact. You might call this belittling, but keep in mind, we've all been through this ourselves, and I'd say that the vast majority of us didn't resort to this strange choice of avenue for dealing with our worries.

    I'd contrast this thread with this other recent example: http://hongkong.geoexpat.com/forum/63/thread227853.html Someone joins up, asks no-drama, sensible adult questions and gets practical responses in the same vein.
    Last edited by jgl; 05-05-2012 at 01:36 PM.

  6. #46

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    Quote Originally Posted by almightygoodgod:
    Jeez, the OP is just a little down, just looking for a few reassurances. It is a big scary move and living away from your partner in the run up to that can make it even scarier. Just because someone is a bit down and anxious doesn't mean they are being negative, it means they want someone to tell them everything is going to be okay and help them look forward to it.

    I'm doing my second big move in the summer and I will be heading out there before my wife. It's only two weeks but I wish I could move at the same time as her, experience all the new things for the first time together. I know it will be hard on her even though it is only two weeks and it is not the first time we have moved to a new country. Nobody at home (that's where she will be) understands as they have never done it. It is hard for them to realise that even though it is a great opportunity and adventure it is still scary. Will we like it, will we make friends? Your head tells you to stop worrying and logic reassures you that yo will be fine, but it doesn't stop the fear that creeps in as you are lying in bed trying to go to sleep and you can't stop all of the 'what ifs' running through your head. Honestly, I suffer from it now, and I want this new move more than anything. It is natural to feel anxious when moving out of our comfort zone, otherwise it wouldn't be called a comfort zone. It is the ability to go through with it despite those anxieties that help us progress better ourselves.
    Good stuff.

  7. #47

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    I blame the mainlanders.

    carang, Molie and HowardCoombs like this.

  8. #48

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    Yep some foul moods around today and people spoiling for a fight. I just got ripped to shreds for daring to suggest that someone search the site for info and politely asking them not to keep posting titles with caps lock on!


  9. #49

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    Well, to be fair, he did remember to turn off caps lock halfway through the title And he's from a background where weird use of case and even spelling is the norm rather than an exception.

    Otherwise, it was a classic case of wanting to be spoon fed though!


  10. #50

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    Quote Originally Posted by almightygoodgod:
    Jeez, the OP is just a little down, just looking for a few reassurances. It is a big scary move and living away from your partner in the run up to that can make it even scarier. Just because someone is a bit down and anxious doesn't mean they are being negative, it means they want someone to tell them everything is going to be okay and help them look forward.
    A 'big scary move', seriously? My assumption is that the OP is an adult. The fact that people move across the world all the time and are fine should be reassurance enough. If they need someone to hold their hand, much better to seek sympathy from family or friends.
    bookblogger likes this.

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