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what's going on with the dating or making new friends in HK?

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  1. #21

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    Ops, sorry sorry, my mistake, my English is bad, now I see the "dilemma"
    When I meant "hook up" I meant start chatting, not something sexual. My bad, I'm sorry, English is not my first language

    P.S. Just checked the meaning, I didn't mean to say "hookup" I mean to say a girl to start a conversation and possibly a friendship.

    Last edited by alfeno; 29-04-2014 at 08:04 PM.

  2. #22

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    Pretending you want to be 'friends' is not going to get you very far. If you genuinely want 'friends' join a social club of some sort.


  3. #23

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    Quote Originally Posted by alfeno
    Why, if you are taking your coffee and you see a girl seating there, and suddenly your mind starts to fly and thinking on how you would be happy to hang out with her, that only the sight of her makes your shitty coffee taste sweeter, and the cloudy day becoming a sunny morning? Also why should sound weird if you want to start an innocent conversation with a stranger?
    What you have written comes across as creepish. I'm sure its worse in person.
    Online dating is awful for some reasons. Male competition is fierce to say the least. Each of these girls is receiving like 20 or 30 messages per day from guys ranging from super-fit muscle to investment banking manager wannabees.
    I know many pudgy non-bankers, ordinary normal nice guys who have met lovely partners. I can guarantee you that the problem is not the competition, but its you.
    Some of the girls on online websites are there just to receive the messages to fulfill their ego. I have had an account on OKCupid and didn't seem to work.
    I have no doubt some are there for ego reasons but I doubt you failed for that reason. Just by your writing here, I get the hebe-jebe's from you. Your OKC profile probably reflected the same thing.
    So where should I hang out?
    Stop trying too hard and be nice and genuine...Hang out where there are opportunities to make conversation without being threatening. Some people do this in communities, churches, social clubs and more.
    I know this place has high number of single and eligible women - vast majority of them are also quite fit : http://www.meetup.com/hongkonghikingmeetup/

  4. #24

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    Quote Originally Posted by MCDC
    It's creepy that you're prowling coffee shops looking for a hookup
    Sorry, I didn't mean to say "hookup" I meant to say start a conversation and possibly friendship. I'm not really prowling coffee shops.

    Quote Originally Posted by usehername
    If you want to date local girls in their 20s you should be in places like Beijing and Billion.
    I'm 31, would date girls in the range of 25-30 or around that age I guess.

    Quote Originally Posted by bibbju
    Is that why you go for younger women? Because you hope they'll fall for this rubbish?
    As above let's say 25-30. I'm 31

  5. #25

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    Quote Originally Posted by HowardCoombs
    What you have written comes across as creepish. I'm sure its worse in person.
    I know many pudgy non-bankers, ordinary normal nice guys who have met lovely partners. I can guarantee you that the problem is not the competition, but its you.
    I have no doubt some are there for ego reasons but I doubt you failed for that reason. Just by your writing here, I get the hebe-jebe's from you. Your OKC profile probably reflected the same thing.
    Stop trying too hard and be nice and genuine...Hang out where there are opportunities to make conversation without being threatening. Some people do this in communities, churches, social clubs and more.
    I know this place has high number of single and eligible women - vast majority of them are also quite fit : http://www.meetup.com/hongkonghikingmeetup/
    OK, Thanks for your tips.

  6. #26

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    What's wrong with striking up a conversation with someone in a coffee shop? Good grief.


  7. #27

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    Quote Originally Posted by alfeno
    How can I approach a girl without looking like a rapist?
    Oh my! What? Seriously?

    One of the funnier things I've read online for a while.

    Anyhow, carry on folks....

  8. #28

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    Quote Originally Posted by bookblogger
    What's wrong with striking up a conversation with someone in a coffee shop? Good grief.
    Absolutely nothing, its perfectly normal and if its initiated with a smile and its suitably reciprocated, it can be quite pleasant.

    However "...if you are taking your coffee and you see a girl seating there, and suddenly your mind starts to fly and thinking on how you would be happy to hang out with her, that only the sight of her makes your shitty coffee taste sweeter, and the cloudy day becoming a sunny morning...." thats not going to start nor end well
    bibbju, Fiona in HKG and cookie09 like this.

  9. #29

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    @bookblogger. I don't know. Maybe is not part of the culture here. I see HowardCoombs has been living here for long time so I suppose he knows well how things works here.


  10. #30

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    Quote Originally Posted by HowardCoombs
    Absolutely nothing, its perfectly normal and if its initiated with a smile and its suitably reciprocated, it can be quite pleasant.

    However "...if you are taking your coffee and you see a girl seating there, and suddenly your mind starts to fly and thinking on how you would be happy to hang out with her, that only the sight of her makes your shitty coffee taste sweeter, and the cloudy day becoming a sunny morning...." thats not going to start nor end well
    Oh I see what is wrong. I get it now.
    Thanks for sharing your tips, I really appreciate it.

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