Report: San Francisco To Shut Doors Over Rising Rent - The Onion - America's Finest News Source
Saying that staying in its current location was no longer feasible, sources across San Francisco confirmed Thursday that the popular Northern California city would be shutting its doors at the end of the month due to rising rent.Residents and business owners of the iconic West Coast metropolis, which has occupied the same peninsula for generations, told reporters that spiraling costs had reached such a level that remaining in its 47-square-mile waterfront space was simply beyond its means.
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“Unfortunately, we just can’t afford to keep San Francisco in San Francisco Bay,” Gonzalez added.According to sources, the city’s rent has increased by more than 40 percent since 2010—including 16 percent in the past year alone—requiring San Francisco to set aside a greater share of its income each year until finally pricing it out of the Bay Area completely. While San Franciscans expressed their hope that the municipality could stay somewhere close by, they noted that rents have also risen sharply in the East Bay and that the costly Silicon Valley area was “completely out of their price range,” leaving the city with no choice but to look for a spot further inland.“Besides,” he added, “for what we’re paying here, we can probably get a place that’s newer and way less cramped.”
With the municipality’s departure imminent, San Franciscans have reportedly begun the task of preparing for the move by calling to disconnect the city’s electric and water service from the local San Francisco Public Utilities Commission and beginning to pack up the city’s many cable cars.