Whats the chances of an Aussie girl meeting a nice expat...

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  1. #101

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    Quote Originally Posted by discobay:
    I think the OP has lost interest in this thread but you good people carry on.
    Poor Gilly,

    if this forum didn't scare her off, nothing ever will.


    Quiet an interesting read though, all rather revealing, I liken some of the age difference comments, to being off ya scone drunk the night before, and regretting what was said later...

    I agree implicitly, with Jimbo, Aussie Girl and Moving07, and feel exactly the same way.


    Now, a message for Gilly, providing of course, she has stuck around, to stomach more .

    What I can say, whether it is as bad as some have stated during this rather evocative, if not, heated discussion, really is debatable, and really depends on which clique you slot into, once you arrive here. The old adage of, birds of a feather, definitely rings true in this town.

    At the end of the day, it all hinges on how affected by peer group pressure you are, if you aren't, then you will find some very cool, low maintenance friends, to explore your free time with...

    Whether you find your mister right here in Hong Kong, Paris, or Tim Buck Too, that doesn't really matter. What matters, is that you enjoy the life experience, of trying something new, working in an exciting location, a decision crafted by you, not distorted, by the bad experiences of a minor few, on this forum.

    Give it a fair dinkum go, Gilly, you won't regret it.
    Last edited by Skyhook; 21-11-2008 at 10:13 PM.

  2. #102

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    Quite a few Filipinas in that list. I was thinking wider - say Indians (arranged marriages still VERY common); Chinese (I believe rural mainlanders are still using matchmakers and horoscopes at least as much as love!); Malaysians/Indonesians - still some arrangements but quite a mix etc etc.

    OOPs - skyhook snuck in there [waves to skyhook], this related to the one above....

    Last edited by MovingIn07; 21-11-2008 at 10:05 PM.

  3. #103

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    Quote Originally Posted by aussiegal:
    Hmm, repeating something someone said to me is propogating a story? So next time you hear or read something, anything, even being related first hand, don't bother telling us... you'll just be propogating something...

    Er2, you always take things out of context. Perhaps English is not your first language or else you are just argumentative?
    I'm indeed no native speaker. This means I need to check the dictionary for words like argumentative to make sure I get the right meaning.
    For your statement "This is right", in the reply to ScotchDrinkers post and preceding your comment about Philippine college degrees, I felt like my command of English was sufficient.
    As a reminder - this was the statement you called correct:
    Quote Originally Posted by ScotchDrinker:
    As for how incredibly qualified DHs are - I'm sorry but I'm just getting sick and tired of this argument. Put it this way, if some guy comes onto Geo and asks about job prospects in HK (for example), and mentions that he's got a degree from the Bolton Uni, you're hardly gonna exclaim "gee, look how qualified this guy is!" True, from my personal knowledge some DHs are trained nurses, and I know one who's got an accounting degree - but the truth remains, just because someone's got "qualifications" doesn't mean he/ she is "qualified". Back in the UK, almost every scumbag can get "qualifications".
    Well, I find it really "incorrect". If MovingIn07 gets an application for her consulting firm from a guy with a degree from Bolton U (is that a real Uni?) of course she might not be impressed. But if same guy applies to clean up after her, wouldn't she (or anyone else) directly respond with "isn't it ridiculous to do the chores when you have _any_ college degree"?

    Quote Originally Posted by aussiegal:
    As for your comment - "Hmm, wonder what you would say if you had to tidy up the household of some, say, Indian family, if they were going to ask you if you wouldn't rather do something according to your education." - again completely ridiculous given you don't know the context of my conversation with our helper. I was discussing the fact that when we leave if there is anything I can do to help her move into a decent paying job I would, particularly if it meant using her degree. That's when she laughed and said their degrees were meaningless. And yes, we pay well above award wage before you take another thing out of context.
    Well, indeed their degrees are meaningless. Which tells you exactly nothing about her qualifications, but about the (probably well deserved) picture the world has about the Philippines. Yes, she couldn't go to Harvard. Might have to do more with her citizenship than with her skills or brains or anything.

    Quote Originally Posted by MovingIn07:
    I agree with you. I know i was not the person I am now at 20, and I much prefer the mature me. It does seem to be "political correctness" talking here to say that the young SE Asian women with older men just happened to fall in love, rather than specifically to be looking for stability/money. I mean, look at the cultures involved. Many of these cultures think that marrying for love is bizarre and that marriages should be 1) arranged 2) are all about money/prospects and / or having kids.

    Given that they clearly do not think it 'wrong' to be picking a mate for his prospects rather than his good looks or witty conversation, why should this surprise us?

    OF COURSE there are exceptions. There are always exceptions. But what Aussiegal is saying would appear to be a more reasonable stereotype than not.
    Hmm. Funny. I agree with you, but not with Aussiegirl. Maybe it is my level of English But I think you are a bit off the point that was discussed before. A) Ok, you say you prefer the mature you - doesn't mean everyone else would. Being more mature sometimes means loosing illusions (and positive thinking), and a positive attitude - realistic or not - can be very attractive. B) Couldn't they fall in love _because of the money_? Ok, just partly, but it might be part of a knight-in-shining-armor (these are friggin pricey) cliche that quite a few women/girls like. Also a stereotype, but also a reasonable one.

    But I think they main point Hull had was that just because a girl is young (and is loved for her youth and beauty) and the guy is old (and is loved for the security and stability he provides) it doesn't mean they cannot have a serious relationship or serious discussions.

    Just to explain where my point of view here comes from - my ex-gf, we were together for four year in a super-long-distance relationship, is American Filipino. US passport, BBA and MACC from UH in Hawaii with transcripts full of A's. And a whole 18 months younger than me. Guess what attitude you get when you travel in South East Asia. We usually handled it the way that she would pay every bill and I pay her back later, just so that the waiters knew that there wouldn't be any tips if they treated her like a hooker. Yeah, I know what the world is like and I also see what goes on on Sunday afternoons in Wan Chai. But I still think human decency requires same treatment for 27y old UK girls with a Bolton U degree and 27y old Filipinas with a degree from Santo Thomas.

    Ok. program finished. Weekend

  4. #104

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly:
    OK fact - I am 51, my wife 27. We have deep and meaningfuls. She can do more than just smile and nod. I can show her off in public (in fact the Pro-Vice Chancellor of my University who has met her, specifically invited her to a black tie dinner hosted by the British Council as a guest of the University). Its bollox Jim.
    Hah, Jimbo, now we have the REAL side of the story, hence the defensiveness... if only he learns how to spell bollocks[/QUOTE]

    Its not defensive Gilly, its anger. If you track back through the threads over the last couple of years you will find I have had this argument repeatedly. I deliberately mispelt bollocks so that is less offensive. The REAL side of the story is not a secret as the regular posters on here will know and I am sure are sick to death of me going on about it whenever anyone comes up with this crap. The one they missed out that usually comes up is the desire for a submissive asian woman. Normally I am sweet honest - but not on this subject (and a couple of others).

  5. #105

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    Quote Originally Posted by discobay:
    I think the OP has lost interest in this thread but you good people carry on.
    Can you blame me? I have been reading through, trying to search the answers for this inane question i so obviously asked... one question about an aussie girl hopes to meet a nice guy has turned into a complete diatribe of abuse... maybe i should stay here in Oz, at least we don't bitch about each others lives

  6. #106

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly:
    Can you blame me? I have been reading through, trying to search the answers for this inane question i so obviously asked... one question about an aussie girl hopes to meet a nice guy has turned into a complete diatribe of abuse... maybe i should stay here in Oz, at least we don't bitch about each others lives
    No we don't blame you,

    but if there was an expat bitching Olympics, Hong Kong, would definitely win the most gold medals...


    Hong Kong is a hoot, providing you avoid the odd wreckpat encounter. Don't let whats typed here in an emotionally charged manner, get to you Gilly...

  7. #107

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly:
    Can you blame me? I have been reading through, trying to search the answers for this inane question i so obviously asked... one question about an aussie girl hopes to meet a nice guy has turned into a complete diatribe of abuse... maybe i should stay here in Oz, at least we don't bitch about each others lives
    Gilly

    Don't let any of this put you off, none of this is personal and we all get along pretty well most of the time, as and when you're over feel free to join us for a few drinks and chew the fat
    And I'm sure I can introduce you to some elegible guys in the meantime too.

  8. #108

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    Gilly, you will get used to it. Expats seem to be more assertive / confident / arrogant / opinionated (delete as you wish) than average. We don't argue about much (except gweilo men and asian women, money and investments, bankers, pollution, is HK racist, rich and poor, religion, politics, the weather, etc. etc.) but mostly this is a friendly place.

    Hope you enjoy your time here and meet the man of your dreams rather than your nightmares. As someone else said you will meet up with people that you are comfortable with, there are all types here. I don't meet up with many expats because basically I have little in common with them but have a very happy life with people I can connect with. I am sure you will be able to do the same.

    Last point: age is not the issue, it is the person within. I can have deep and meaningfuls with someone who is 10, 20, 30...60, 90 as long as they are open and thoughtful people. If they are shallow people or unwilling to be honest with themselves then it does not matter what age they are. It is the ability of two people to connect at a deep level (be they just friends or partners) that matters. My first wife was 5 years older than me, my second wife 24 years younger. No difference that I can see created by the age, but cultural differences are another thing.


  9. #109

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly:
    maybe i should stay here in Oz, at least we don't bitch about each others lives
    Eh? I have to say that your perception doesn't match mine or that of many other people I know. Australians are one of the whiniest cultures I know. Although maybe you copied an example from your history and expelled the worst offenders to Discovery Bay?

  10. #110

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    Quote Originally Posted by PDLM:
    Eh? I have to say that your perception doesn't match mine or that of many other people I know. Australians are one of the whiniest cultures I know. Although maybe you copied an example from your history and expelled the worst offenders to Discovery Bay?
    Aussies whinge, but they whinge about things like government, working conditions, the weather, the footy, the water restrictions, petrol prices, general stuff .. as a general sweeping statement, they don't stab at each others way of life, IMHO.

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